Cut Your Teen's Stress

By Nancy L. Snyderman, M.D.


Homework, popularity and responsibility stress a teen out. Here's how to help him chill.

Get good grades. Be popular. Please your parents. Oh yeah, and learn how to make decisions and take care of yourself. Being a teen is tough, admits Elizabeth Farr, PhD, a clinical psychologist who specializes in stress reduction in children. "The main issue teens face is how to be responsible for themselves," she says. "This places a tremendous burden on them; they feel overwhelmed and exhausted." Want to help your teen chill out? Share these techniques with your teen.

Slow down. You've got big goals but they don't happen all at once. Your approach should be slow and steady, too. Focus on your goal, break it down to manageable pieces and do one step a day.

Banish negative thoughts. Telling yourself no one is ever going to ask you to the prom is not going to help you talk to the guy or girl you're crushing on. Do one of the following to change the message in your head:

Distract yourself. Wear a very loose rubber band on your wrist. When you catch yourself thinking negative thoughts, lightly snap it on your wrist three times and think, "Stop. Stop. Stop."

Find your happy place. Seriously. When you find you're judging yourself too harshly, think of a time and place where you were totally happy. Put yourself there: How warm or cool is it? How bright or dark is it? What do you hear? What do you smell? This should replace stress with good feelings.

Make plans. Don't just "hang out." Plan an activity with friends—a movie, a party—to look forward to at the end of a busy week.

Work out the stress. Regular exercise will help release your stress and you don't need to do an hour on the treadmill. Dr. Farr says Pilates and Bollywood dancing are the popular classes in her area. Find one that appeals to you, grab a friend and give it a try.

Recharge daily. Junk food and energy drinks might give you a quick rush, but they won't keep you going through those all-nighters. Keep nuts and fruit in your locker or backpack for a quick, healthy snack.

Catch some sleep. Teens need 8-9/4 hours of sleep a night. Don't skimp on sleep, especially during midterms or other stressful periods. Aim to crash at the same time every night—you can't "make up" lost sleep on the weekend.

Talk to someone. Sure, you tell your friends your problems, but talking to an adult will help you get a balanced opinion. Don't want someone to tell you what to do? That's fine. Talk to a school counselor, a trusted teacher or maybe a therapist. Then make up your mind about what to do next.

via: http://www.bewell.com/ArticleDetail.aspx?id=1674&type=1